Mental Health Journal - I Remember When I Finally Figured It Out!
Through trials, suffering, and intense hardships, I learned what true God-Centered humility looks like in the mind and the heart.
It took me until about the age of 40 to realize the value of emotional and spiritual maturity. By far, one of the most valuable resources one can have is humility combined with strong maturity. I remember reading a book years ago entitled “Emotional Intelligence 2.0.” I remember thinking it was academically stimulating, but it didn’t connect with my heart or actions. For most of my life, I was riddled with pride and a sinful self-confidence. The idea that I needed humility, combined with a growing emotional maturity, never crossed my mind.
Then, one day, I finally figured it out. Through trials, suffering, and intense hardships, I learned what true God-Centered humility looks like in the mind and the heart. After being diagnosed with major depressive disorder, I began a journey towards a stronger mental health and maturity that would bring me joy and confidence that is rooted in Christ and not in myself.
A few things began to change as I moved along the path in this journey:
Disposition - My base disposition changed dramatically. I went from a person with general angst and irritability towards life, and began to see all the beautiful colors that life has to offer.
Depression - My depression and depressive episodes, while not healed, have dramatically reduced in quantity and duration. It is amazing what stress can do to a body!
Devotion - I am far more devoted to God and His Word than I ever was before. I find that I am far more concerned with His will than mine.
Patience - My ability to demonstrate patience is far higher. I remember when just about anything could set me on a path of anger and stress. Now, I shrug things off far better. I patiently let things develop and “marinate,” if you will. It is amazing to me how many things naturally take care of themselves, or God takes care of when we chill and don’t force things.
One of the things that most people don’t want to admit is how easily angered we are when we are emotionally and spiritually immature. If one wants to, one can find just about anything to be angry about. Trust me, I know!
However, it takes self-control, resistance to circumstantial anger, and a good dose of humility to overcome this repeated pattern. Take, for example, the person who goes into a store or place of business and berates the person working in there over a problem they did not create nor has any real control over, and then has the audacity after treating them disrespectfully, and in some cases, like trash, to say, “Oh, I know it is not your fault.” Well, if you knew that, then you would not have treated that person in that manner.
First of all, Christians should NEVER do this. There is no excuse for it. You do not get to treat people however you want just because you are a consumer. So, stop it!
Secondly, you can tell a person’s lack of maturity by how they act in public because what they show you in public is actually who they are, but to a lesser degree than what they are privately. So, if someone is willing to publicly berate someone, then I really don’t want to see what you would do privately.
Pride, combined with emotional immaturity, convinces us that we are far more important than everyone else and that whatever we deem to be important at any given moment should be handled immediately and to our liking. Self-centeredness is the root of sinful pride and immaturity.
Sadly, in my view, the thing that plagues the church today far more than anything else is emotional and spiritual immaturity. Look at how often people are willing to bash and berate Pastors, Deacons, or fellow congregants when they “don’t get their way.” It is sickening and pathetic, to be quite honest with you.
We need to chart a different course. I am charting a different course. I don’t want to be marked among the immature anymore. I don’t want to pridefully put myself above everyone else anymore. By God’s grace, I will continue to grow in greater emotional and spiritual maturity.
